Ben Braeden

Left a good job in the city,
Working for The Man every night and day,
And I never lost one minute of sleeping,
Worrying 'bout the way things might have been.
Proud Mary - Credence Clearwater Revival

The flashbulbs and the bright lights were commonplace in the life of Boaz Ramone. He wore his sunglasses almost all the time to deaden the little white light flashes they caused in his vision for minutes after each picture, and only took them off when it got too dark to see inside.

It was another awards show, another after party, and a pretty blonde on his arm as they walked up the red carpet that Boaz didn't even know her name, but sure as hell would know hear her screaming his when the night was over. It was how the game was played, and he loved every moment of it.

But when he was sober and in the shower in the mornings, he remembered still how he had gotten there. He could still remember the awkward teenager who got lucky and made a band with a few friends in high school that led him to trying out for the singing reality show on a dare. The weeks he spent out in Hollywood for the show whizzed by as a series of training sessions, recordings and eventually his hair was cut and his clothes were picked out for him and he was rocking out to the music he grew up loving all his life. Somehow he even won the damn thing, and there was a tour and cd's and parties and somewhere along the way little Ben Braeden was gone and all that was left was the rock star.

The life was amazing - more than he ever imagined. The alcohol and drugs came freely, which he abused the first and avoided the second most of the time. He hung out with all the popular stars around his age and didn't have to pay for a single thing as his record label provided it all.

And the girls? They were literally climbing through his windows just to have a night with the great and sexy Boaz Ramone. If Ben knew who his father was, he was pretty sure the man would be damn proud of that.

It was a good life and Ben was smart enough still to know it wasn't always going to last. He was the flavor of the week right now, but soon he was going to fade into a has-been obscurity and he was going to be prepared to let himself be comfortable when it happened. Right now it was all about living life to the fullest, making his mama proud, and of course making a damn good acceptance speech tonight when he won another award for his debut CD after he gave an epic performance all the morning shows would be talking about tomorrow.

Boaz Ramone was the hottest thing in town, and he was going to make sure they remembered why.

15. “If you hurt that girl I will kill you, nurse you back to health, and then kill you again!”
| Off Centre

It was hard standing off to the side, finishing his drink as he leaned against his car. Ben knew it was only a few minutes before she would be gone again, but he tried not to focus on that. Especially not as she came jogging back to him from the three truckers who she had been talking to.

The smile on her face let him know she had her next ride, and he tried to hide the disappointment on his face. There was a small part of him that hated seeing her off. He wished he could just keep her at his side and hold her tight and never let her go.

But this was the fate of loving a girl with large wings, he had learned. She needed her freedom and had so many travel urges that she wouldn't be happy with him if he tried to keep her in one spot. She had to take these trip, and he loved her enough to let her go.

Her arms wrapped around his neck and she kissed him. Blindly putting the drink on the roof of his car, he then wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close. It would be another few months before he saw her again, and he needed to remember this moment to last him for all those lonely nights ahead.

Then he picked up her bag and walked her back to the trucker that was waiting. She tossed it up in the cab and slowly pulled away from him, losing contact first with his side, then her hand slowly running down his arm, into his palm, and he locked fingers with her a moment, just squeezing them.

Please don't go, his eyes whispered, but they were hidden behind the smile as he left her go to climb up into the passenger seat. The trucker closed the door, and Ben stopped to give him just a single look. A warning, one that told the trucker that if anything happened to his girlfriend, Ben would come looking for him with a vengeance.

Then a minute later the truck was pulling out of the station and onto the open road. A hand waved out the window to him, which Ben waved back before heading to his car and back to college. The car was empty now, and he tried futilely to fill the space with music. It just had to last until he was back at school, and then that little world would engulf him again and it wouldn't hurt so much to be apart from her.

But he would still miss her, and worry that she was ok. And especially wait until she was back in his arms again.

“You don't need to worry about me. In a fight I just kind of stand in the back and just yell stuff.”
| Friday Night Lights

Before I left for college, we joked about going on one last hunt. A big father and sons bonding thing. However, as we tracked down the ghoul in the back alleys of sector 2, it became fairly obvious that I wasn't meant for this life.

I mean, Ruby kinda called it once before. When I had to train while Sam was in the coma, she told me I didn't have what it would take. Sure, I'm a Winchester. I've got the same spirit and stubbornness that Dean, Alec and Sam have. I've got gifts that while they are fixed, I use less and less and in a way, not really sorry that I haven't kept up my training.

However, I had something that none of them really had. Well, Dad did, but only for a few years. A mother. Alec jokes that I'm the stablest one in the family because of it. I grew up normal, in a loving family far from wars and hate and demons... well, except that one time with the changeling and all.

I guess that makes me different than them. I'm not able to stomach a lot of the things that go on during a hunt, even if I try to fake it. And Dean never really wanted me to get into this job, so I have a feeling my telling him I wanted to leave and go to college was a wish granted in his book.

It would also explain why I'm left to stand on a fire escape while Alec and Dean slug it out with the ghoul down below. I helped them with the tracking and singling the woman out in the crowd. Now I just sit back and watch the fight.

Well, not just watch it.

"Oh come on, Alec! You're letting a chick kick your ass! Where are those ninja skills - ouch. Dad, you alright? Dude, now that's gonna leave a mark. Girl ain't gonna be going on any dinner dates soon now."

Hey, I'm still part Winchester. What I lack in fighting skills, I make up in my smart mouth. I'm sure that still makes Dad proud.


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